My feelings towards gatherings...

As we know, once we are married and we go to any family gatherings, questions like

'Are you pregnant? Any good news? Are you on family planning? Quickly get a baby. How long you've been married? Still no children? Are you going for treatment?  

is so common. I remember times when I felt sad hearing all the remarks from family and friends regarding childless topic all the time. There was once I had to go to a close relative engagement which was after 1 month after my miscarriage and D&C. There came one of my cousin happily congratulating me on my pregnancy (I did not know my mom told her). I was so fragile at the moment. I tried not to break out in front of her, collected myself together and told her my sad story. She felt bad for me. After that, I tried to avoid many gatherings unless unavoidable functions for 2 months. Days went by, months went by, and years went by..... I actually got used to all the questions from my family and friends. When they ask I just say 'Not yet. Not yet blessed'. Easy way out, just smile. I have been much stronger along the 2 years plus TTC. I could really handle their questions now. I am just used to the normal set of questions now.

We have a lot of gatherings, family functions, weddings now and then. Last Saturday, my husband and I attended my cousin's engagement. I was bombarded as usual with the normal questions. I handled it well. There was one aunty touching my stomach and asking ' Not yet ah'. I just said 'Not yet' with a smile. Another aunty asks me to keep on taking medicines. Then came another cousin asking how long married and she asked me to go treatment. I told her I was. Then came a far related grandmother. The toughest questions usually come from the oldest people. When she started to ask how long I was married, I was mentally prepared for the worst question to come. I was so surprised with what she said at last. She told me nothing to worry. No children also never mind. You have him and he has you. Just be as happy as you are now. All will be fine. WOW....That made my adrenaline pumping all the way. That was so new comment from an oldie...Her daughter told me to go for treatment and she told me it's ok to be childless. Such a refreshing comment from what I usually hear. I told my husband what the grandmother told on the way back.

I will be excited every month to TTC. Even any month fail, I will try to come out of it quickly because the sadder I am the chances to get pregnant the next month is much lower. As I have pushed my IVF to April cycle, I am starting to eat healthy and exercise to keep me fit. I hope that helps.

 

I am very positive my husband and I will be blessed soon. I do not know when but till then I will keep trying for a sunshine.